Since childhood, I seemed to have an insatiable appetite for spirituality. Though raised Christian, the idea never resonated that one religion held exclusive rights to truth. And so I explored with an open mind, attempting to understand what underlaying message they were all attempting to convey. But no matter how much I learned, there seemed to be something that I was missing.
Eventually, at the age of thirty, having become disillusioned with life, with religion, even with my own understanding of the world, I decided to abandon everything I had worked for, everything I had believed in, my whole life, and to start again from scratch. I wanted to see what would happen if I abandoned all belief in who I was and in what I thought the world to be. I thought, if God existed, then He will show me. Nothing less than the truth would be acceptable. It was a difficult experiment to say the least, but one that primed me to understand what would later come, an even more thorough breaking apart of the concepts that had been unwittingly taken on without question.
Fast forward two years later, and things just started coming together. There was an understanding that just began arising on its own along with uncaused joy. I didnt know what to make of it, but I welcomed it. Soon afterward, I randomly decided one day to try meditation. What I didn't know is that my entire perspective on life was again about to be shaken down to its core.
I discovered that I was not the body, but that I was who was viewing the body. This led to the dissolving of the body into the universe. I saw also that I was the one viewing the universe, and it also dissolved before me. I then sought to find the source from where the universe began, and when finding that it began in stillness, took the step into stillness, thinking it might cost me my life. In a way, it did cost me my life, but what I found was worth everything that had been given up, just a bunch of empty meaningless concepts, in exchange for that which no words can do justice, the truth of who I am, of who we all are.
Since then, I have seen how helpful this message is to those who suffer. Suffering is just a sign that we are caught up in false beliefs, in empty concepts of the mind, and have forgotten the truth of who we are. We are always that, even while ignorant of this fact, and so are always free, always loved, always perfect. All that I can do, is point you back to the truth which you already know, that there is only One, and you are That.